After reading a comment from a person on a hairloss forum about an update, it reminded that I have been very slack about updating. I can remember thinking before I did all of this craziness that I would update every day, and couldn’t understand those who forgot to update. But I must admit as the months have progressed, I have realised how much I think about hair loss now, maybe 2% at most, which is a vast improvement to before which was at like 99% (only because the other 1% was thinking about food)
I can remember clearly, how it consumed my life, I felt like it was everyones obligation to find a cure for me, if someone did not update frequently I felt negative feelings for them, it made me very selfish and think of only me me me. I can’t even count the amount of times I became excited about a new product that someone had discovered, just for it two weeks down the line to be exposed as a fake. I invested all my energy into finding a cure for what I had, like millions have and what the majority who read have done too. Three names always stuck out to me, Histogen, Aderans and replicel, I must have searched this 10,000 times and everyday would be checking their websites and forums for updates. My life was very unhealthy and an obsession that pushed me towards doing the best thing i could have done, invested money into a proven solution.
I was very lucky in the sense that I live in the world I do where we can fix this early on, I really feel for the NW7’s of the world who didn’t have this technology 30years ago. The thing is, my hair, behind the recession has always been dense and I could not be happier with it, it is just I could never get my hair line to fall the way it used to which made me obsess, and cut my hair is such a weird way that it would hide the recession, but then gave me a weird tudor style full fringe. I have always said that I don’t mind if I develop a bald spot because that is simply ageing, where as a fucked up fringe in just monster-like for my face (as its rather round). I had a plan, ht in the front and system in the back, which led me to thinking “fuck it, lets just fix the front now so i can enjoy my life again” but who to choose?
They are all the same right? fuck it, i’d prefer to only spend £1,000 instead of £6,000. they do the same thing, this is such an easy decision. That is like saying £10mil striker Mitrovic would do the same job upfront than £60mil Neymar. There is no comparison, money talks, the best ask for the best money and those who are average don’t. I have always believed this and felt that no matter how good the surgeon was, if he was really super amazing, he would compete in price with the very best, knowing he would still get a huge waiting line. I knew that going with Feriduni was the only thing that would make the next year not feel so daunting, whats worse spending £5,000 more or thinking, “I wonder if it would look better with Feriduni”, knowing how obsessive I can be, I knew I only had one choice. Now I’m not ignorant, I know that many people can’t afford the best, but I had the opportunity, I got out a fat loan and did it, I’m sure the cheaper options are just as good, but they would never be a match for me because i’m an obsessive.
Fast forward 1 month after the surgery when everything had healed and my hair was starting to grow back to hide the buzz cut. My anxiety had all but gone, it didn’t matter that it still looked patchy and weedy, it was the knowing that I had done everything that I needed to, for my fringe to return and now I just had to wait, something I hadn’t been able to do before when looking at fancy stem cell solutions.
As the months progress, I think less and less about hair loss and more about the things that make me happy, I moved to another country for fuck sake, I could not have done that before, especially not to MMexico where everyone has beautiful hair. It is really odd, because writing this, I can think of a whole book’s worth of content to write how I felt before the operation but I can barely write a paragraph by how I feel now, I think the best adjective I can use is content. I am content with my hair for the first time in years, content with my life and most importantly content with myself.
The only times I ever check hair loss sites now, is to check in about new treatments that people may be having success with, but instead of feeling impatient about results, I feel like I have all the time in the world. Life is for living, so do what you need to do in order to feel that again, if you are anything like me you are consumed by this, can’t accept it and will never accept it, take control of it, you will never feel ready to have a ht, its a massive leap of faith, make sure you do your research and pick the doctor that suits you well. We are all insignificant atoms that have no impact of the story of the world, however don’t let hairloss ruin the story of your life.
Much Love
John
hope with hairtransplant 